Relay for life speech

Yesterday, I got the privilege to participate in the Washington County relay for life event.  I was their survivor speaker and here is my speech.  

Hi everyone. I want to being my thanking everyone here for taking time out of your weekend and money out of your pockets for your support. You are part of the reason that I am still here. My name is Kelly French and I am a cancer survivor. Before I begin to tell you my story, you need to know my ultimate goal here on this earth. I am a child of God and I believe that my life has a purpose for His good. I strive to live my life to serve Him with every chance that I am given. And this is only of those chances....

I am a 30 year old, pediatric physical therapist who was working full time and attempting to be successful as a wife and Boxer dog mom. Life was trucking along when I was diagnosed in January of this year with a rare form of ovarian cancer. I had what is called a malignant mixed germ cell tumor on my left ovary. Luckily, we caught my cancer early; however, because of its aggressive nature I was facing surgery and chemotherapy. So, in mid January, I had my left ovary and Fallopian tube removed and began 3 rounds, totaling 9 weeks of BEP chemo. I finished chemo on April 1st and as of May 6th, I am cancerfree! 

When I was asked to speak at this event and talk about my journey and about the American Cancer Society I was a bit nervous and had no idea really how to put my experience into words. I was confident in knowing that this was a tool (my cancer journey) that The Lord had intended me to use for His glory. So I hope that my story can benefit someone here. I am a runner and had just completed my first marathon in November of last year. Therefore, it was easy for me to compare my cancer journey to my marathon training. So that's what I'm going to talk about today. The need for knowledge, strength, hope, faith, support, and endurance when looking into cancer's face.

A running coach named Mike Fanelli once said regarding marathons, "I tell our runners to divide the race into thirds. Run the first part with you head, the middle part with your personality, and the last part with your heart." I had read this quote in the weeks preceding my marathon, trying to muster up the courage and willpower to finish strong and it stuck. After actually successfully finishing my race and facing cancer, this quote arose once again in my mind. 

"Run the first part with your head..." When running 26.2 miles, the pace you set for yourself, your hydration, your calorie intake, your knowledge of the course in the first third of the race are critical. Using your head will set the stage for the remainder of your journey. After I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer, my husband and I spent a lot of time researching my particular cancer, prognosis, and outcomes. We were looking up my oncologists' credentials, treatment standards, and chemo regimens. During this time, I also contacted the American Cancer Society. They were so helpful in providing me with resources to help in the initial knowledge of this disease. There is also so much to be found on their website that is specific to each cancer. So with all of this knowledge of what we were facing, I was one step further along.

"...run the middle part with your personality..." As much as I like this running quote as it is, I would change personality to strength. When you are diagnosed with cancer, you have no other option but to be strong. It's time to fight a fight. Whatever stage your cancer is in, you are most likely facing some sort of treatment. During that treatment, you will need the strength of others. During my cancer journey, I learned the most about the need for others. Most importantly, God provided me with strength but my family and friends also kept me strong and upbeat. They showed me selflessness, even when they were struggling with my diagnosis and all the chaos it caused. The ACS will also be your support when you or your family or friends aren't capable. They will provide transportation when you can't drive to an appointment. They offer classes like Look Good, Feel Better, specifically for women to make them feel normal, if not beautiful in the midst of sickness. They provide you with wigs, scarves, and hats when you lose your hair during chemotherapy. They talk to you...they are a shoulder for you and your caregivers to lean on.

And run...."the last part with your heart". At mile 18 during a marathon, many runners hit what is called "the wall". You are running on fumes. Your legs feel like jello and each step forward takes considerable effort. You wonder why in the world you ever signed up to run such a thing. All that keeps you going is the contents of your heart. Regardless of your desire to finish and the condition of your heart, there are many outcomes. Some runners are unable to finish. Some finish and are very frail. Some finish strong. Much is the same with cancer. Marathon running and cancer are not even really comparable. You sign up for running...you definitely don't sign up for cancer. However, they are both journeys. Journeys that require strength, endurance, courage, and a willingness to fight. They both define who we are. They both also take their toll on our bodies. When we feel helpless, the ACS and all of the volunteers and sponsors are our hearts. They advocate, donate, encourage, educate and save our lives. They provide community events like this one to abolish cancer. They inform the community about cancer to aid in prevention and early detection. They raise money for research. They advocate for more birthdays!

The late, Gilda Radner once said "Having cancer gave me membership in an elite club I'd rather not belong to." We are in this together, part of an elite club if you will. But this club isn't quite like all the others. We take the good with the bad. The good is glorious and the bad can be devastating. We are often faced with tests, labs, surgeries, treatments, pain, fear, sadness, sickness, and even death. But we also are blessed with living life knowing that it doesn't last forever. We are given the chance to experience life in the way we should have been all along. This club is full of members, who I proudly stand next to that are courageous and strong, looking cancer straight in the face.

I pray for everyone here. I pray for the families of those we have lost to this disease, those currently fighting, and those in remission. I also thank our families, caregivers and friends. I am thankful for the American Cancer Society and all they are doing for us. With us all working together, I see a future where this disease loses and we gain. In closing, I urge you, members of this elite club and everyone who has been touched by this disease to stand strong in this fight and join hands with the ACS to conquer cancer. 

The Seven Year Itch

Vows...I gave them to a guy named Jason 7 years ago today.  We have all heard them and a lot of us have said them to someone along the way.  But to actually live them out, can we say that we do that?

...to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, in richer, in poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God's holy law, in the presence of God I make this vow...

I can say that in the part sever years, Jason and I have had the opportunity to see each other live out these vows with and without success.  We have experienced a ton of significant stuff together over the past seven years.  We were talking the other night about everything that has happened and here's a list of some of it:

We have moved twice.

Jason graduated medical school.

I started and graduated from PT school.

Jason started and finished residency.

We both started "real" jobs.

My grandmother died.

Both of his grandparents died.

I was diagnosed with and treated for cancer.

My parents were divorced.

I ran a marathon.

Family sicknesses.

Wow.  It seems unreal that all of that stressful stuff has happened in the past 7 years.  Jason has made the tough stuff tolerable.  He makes the stressful stuff worth it.  

I don't know how I really feel about writing about my relationship.  I feel that our love is a pretty private thing, but I do what to pay him respect and tell you just who he is to me!

Let's face it, Jason has had to deal with a lot being married to me.  I realize that and I take full responsibility for who I am.  I talk a lot, worry a lot, and whine a lot.  I come with drama, baggage, and bad habits.  I am a push over and rarely speak up for myself.  I am a horrible cook.  I am ignorant when it comes to finances.  But he loves me.  I know that people would say that I'm too hard on myself, but I'm being honest...and Jason would probably agree to most of this.  The beautiful thing is, Jason compliments most of these things.  He is quiet and reserved.  (He worries just like me!)  He dislikes and avoids drama.  He is an exceptional cook and keeps awesome track of our finances (I bet you don't have a pie chart depicting your monthly spending?!?!?). God knows exactly what we need!  As much as we are a mess, we are a complimenting mess.  We fill in each others missing pieces.  

Jason walked by my side through my cancer diagnosis without faltering.  At 31 years old, he spent hours with me at the doctor, sitting at chemo champ, shaving my head, taking trips to Walgreens, caring for my fatigue and nausea, and flushing out a PICC line on a daily basis.  He has seen me bald, seen with with serious dark circles under my eyes, and asleep with my mouth open at chemo (probably drooling).  I don't what more to say other than thank you.  This love is not fleeting.  He loved me with the love of God, whose love is unconditional.  

I am not the woman I was when he married me.  I'm not as young or as exciting or mysterious.  He knows all my quirky attributes and all my bad habits.  He truly knows me now and I think he's okay with all of the bad that comes with all the good.  I know that's how I feel about him.  I have learned so much more about him over the past 7 years that I would have loved then if I'd had known.  For instance, he fixes things.  If something breaks or goes wrong, he will research it or work on it until it is fixed.  He does not stop until it works as good, if not better, than it did before.  This comes in handy with a marriage.  Another one...he takes care of his possessions.  I have never seen anyone so careful with anything that he owns.  His car, his phone, his fishing stuff, his sunglasses (just to name a few) are always in immaculate condition.  Again, comes in handy in a marriage.  Lastly, he is honest.  I'm from the South and appreciate a little candy coating but Jason is honest.  I am thankful for that.  He keeps me grounded and keeps our marriage real.

I can't wait to see where our years take us!  And I'm so thankful he's mine.  I am grateful that God found enough favor on me to send me such a cool partner.  I love him dearly and pray that i can be half of what he is to me!  Happy anniversary Jason French (or Grinch)!  

Here's some pictures...the first one is on Father's Day weekend...then in October 2012....our honeymoon...wedding...proposal night...and the 2nd time we met!